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I HATE Seasonal Depression!

In this post, I attempt to shed a “sunny” light on the dark days the winter season brings…

We’re currently mired in the midst of dark, winter days here in the northern portions of the northern hemisphere. Days with little daylight are rough.

I’ve written previously about my annual struggle with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). It starts hurting somewhere in mid-September, though it really ramps up after the time change in early November (specifically, from the time change through Thanksgiving.) Usually, once the Holidays are in full swing and I’m excited about Christmas the ache eases a bit.

I was SO THANKFUL, several years ago, when they changed the date clocks fall back to the first Sunday in November instead of the last in October (yes, that week MATTERS). It meant staving off the worst of the SAD ache for a few more weeks.

Then, after the Holidays, I start struggling again. The weather is crappy, the sun is still setting well before 5:00 pm, and most of the sparkling, Christmas lights are gone from the neighborhood, so they no longer offer their break from the seemingly, endless darkness.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) hurts!

Individual people experience varying degrees of severity and symptoms with this disorder. For me, they’re mostly classified by irritability, emotional sensitivity (I burst into tears easily), the desire to lash out at those around me for daring to engage in the most ghastly of behaviors (such as chewing or swallowing loudly 🤯), or…loud breathing (must people do it CONSTANTLY?! 😉)

For me it isn’t so much a sense of hopelessness or of impending doom, it feels more like incessant PMS (this descriptor won’t be much help to the members of my audience with a Y chromosome. 😂) I just don’t feel good! I want to curl up in sweatpants, in the dark, and eat a pound of Doritos with a two-pound bar of Hershey’s, Special Edition, Dark Chocolate as a chaser…and wash it all down with a Big Gulp of Cherry Coke!

I’m a midwestern girl so, naturally, I think all emotional pain should be solved with food, preferably something of the casserole variety (with main ingredients of cheese, potatoes, or cream of mushroom soup! 🤤)

*I don’t mean to make light of this–admittedly difficult–condition. I just try not to take myself too seriously. A little good-natured jesting helps me to keep things in perspective. Plus they claim it takes more muscles to frown than to smile, and I’m lazy so…😉*

Embrace the dark of winter

In another post I wrote, regarding my disorder, I discuss ways I try to mitigate the “ouch factor” by embracing the darkness. In that post, I encourage people to seek out the peace and tranquility present in sizable amounts of dark hours. A good example of this is enjoying the peace that settles over the chilly nights when stars speckle across the dark blanket of sky that drapes across you.

The Trekkers are fortunate to live in an area of (fairly minimal) light pollution–we can actually see the Milky Way from our backyard on clear nights! This is even more true if we head out of town to the true darkness the Black Hills proffers.

You never know what you’ll observe when enjoying the quiet peace of the dark evening. Owls hooting in the distance, a shooting star, the lost Dominos driver cruising past your house multiple times searching for the correct address…😂 Also, I’ve learned, Mother Nature provides natural refrigeration for your wine if you are outside on those cold nights! 😁

Rushing the holidays increases stress

During the fall months, when my SAD is usually at its worst, I find the rush to Christmas also increases my stress.

Now, don’t get me wrong folks, I’m no Grinch, I LOVE Christmas. There are no “bah humbugs!” coming from the Trekker household! Mr. Trekker’s ears are usually bleeding from the excess of Christmas music by January 1st. 😂 I LOVE the sparkling decorations; the music and movies (here’s looking at you Clark Griswald!); the food, the parties, and the time spent with family. I even LOVE the snow (if you’re actually lucky enough to have a white Christmas these days! 😝)

I just think there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. Since when does Christmas start in October? (In the US at least) there is a whole other holiday between that month and “the Jolly Old Elf” people! 😜 November is still Fall! Leaves are still falling, the deer haven’t finished gorging on the pumpkins on our front stoop yet. As Sally from Charlie Brown would say, “I haven’t even finished all my Halloween candy!” Then there’s all the stress and commercialization of the Holidays…

Why are we always in such a hurry to rush through life? Why can’t we learn to take each day, week, month (and holiday!) as it comes? There is a lot of busyness and stress that comes with the Holiday Season. Can we have a little time to ramp up to it? And seriously ya’ll, do we really want to rush to the dull, dark days of January?! REALLY?!

STOP RUSHING ME!!! 😜 (Straight No Chaser does a GREAT song about this, by the way! 😂)

Days with little daylight

I don’t know about where the rest of you live, but in western South Dakota, it’s DARK dark by 5:30 for three months of the year, and during the darkest times the sun is down by 4:00. 😜 (If anyone is reading this post in even more extreme latitudes, you have my MOST SINCERE sympathy). BUT, at least for some of that time, it is starting to get light by 6 am. That makes dragging my sorry butt out of bed a little easier!

The good news is, we only have a short time left until the Solstice! There is a light at the end of the tunnel! While these short days SUCK!, it means the countdown has started. And now the sparkling lights and festive music of the Christmas Season have arrived in earnest to raise our spirits!

Other Vitamin D3 options: Nature’s Bounty, Nature Made 2000 IU tablets, NOW softgels, Extra Strength!

Once the Holiday Season is over, January’s dark days come (though they are getting a little shorter!) Then finally it’s on to February and the sun starts staying up past 5! (My mood usually starts to improve again when we return to more normal daylight lengths.)

So, until then, get outside as much as you can (or at least sit by a window and enjoy some sun and daylight whenever possible), and don’t forget the Vitamin D3!

I’m also a fan of fun movies, this is when you pull out the good stuff. My personal favorites are those with car chases or anything that makes me laugh (they say it’s the best medicine!) There is absolutely nothing wrong with 12-hour Star Wars or Netflix marathons on cold, dreary days (just open the curtains so you get some daylight!) 🌞

I’ll just be hunkering down here for the next few weeks with my temporary best friends, dreaming of bright sunshine! A little “woosah!” doesn’t hurt either (and if you haven’t seen Bad Boys 2, I strongly recommend it for a little distraction during these dark days!)

Heads up ya’ll, the countdown to daylight has begun!

How do you cope during the darkest days of the year? Tell me about it in the comments!

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Therapy Lamp and Calm App Reviews

I review a light, therapy lamp and an app I use to decrease symptoms of anxiety and seasonal depression.

I’ve mentioned before that I struggle with general anxiety as well as SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder), and that I prefer behavioral treatment methods over psychotropic medications. Below are two, non-medication, products that I use regularly and that I find help greatly, a therapy lamp and the Calm app:

Light Therapy Lamp

During the fall and winter, as the daylight wanes, this tool is a must for me (these have been documented to help decrease the symptoms of SAD.) There are several versions of this device, but this is the specific, light therapy lamp I use several months out of the year.

You have to be careful which ones you buy as they need to provide at least 10,000 lux of light, the minimum wavelength required to stimulate your brain correctly. Unfortunately, the good ones aren’t cheap. The old adage is true, however, “you get what you pay for”. When you’re experiencing several dark, cloudy days in a row, I find this helps, significantly, so it’s worth the cost.

Other Vitamin D3 options: Nature’s Bounty, Nature Made 2000 IU tablets, NOW softgels

This is not a perfect replacement for true sunlight, and it offers no source of Vitamin D3 (I mentioned previously that I enhance my levels with supplements in the winter months). But, when you’re struggling amid a string of several gray days–and especially when you’re driving both to work and home in the dark 😝–this device helps to brighten up your world a little bit.

A word of warning, because of the way it stimulates your brain, it can cause sleep disturbances if it’s used too closely to bedtime. I use it in the morning and evenings, in the kitchen, when I’m preparing meals or doing dishes. Those are the times I notice the lack of daylight the most and these timeframes don’t affect my sleep habits. You’re supposed to sit within a certain distance of the lamp, though I find just having it in the same room I’m in and being able to see the light provides relief.

Other therapy lamp choices: Happy Light Luxe; Happy Light full-size; Happy Light UV-free; Happy Light Alba; Happy Ligh Lumi; Happy Light Compact; Happy Light Touch

The Calm App

Another tool I LOVE (and use throughout the year) is the Calm app, available for Android and IOS. Several versions of the app exist, including a free, limited version–this is the one I use.

The app showcases multiple relaxing sounds (including heavy rain, a thunderstorm, waves, and a sunny lake), and white noise options (such as floating clouds or deep space). These are complemented by animated scenes that are incredibly beautiful to watch.

The paid versions also offer spoken meditation podcasts and sleep stories. You can visit the app’s website here or search for it on the App Store. I cannot recommend this product enough (I’ve gotten Mr. Trekker using it as well! 😁)

If you find yourself struggling with the ever-increasing darkness of the winter season, or just need help calming your mind, check out these products!

Have you ever used these tools? Tell me about your experiences in the comments!

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Black Elk Peak, Trail #9 (the Difficult, Northern Route)

In this post, I detail our attempts to conquer Trail #9, the difficult/northern route up Black Elk Peak.

Black Elk Peak, formerly Harney Peak, is the highest point in the Black Hills and one of the most sought-after hikes in this area.

In case you aren’t aware of it (and as I outlined in this post), the name of this mountain changed just a few years ago and they’re still working on updating all the signs and maps.

There are multiple trail options for getting to the summit. The most popular route is the southern portion of Trail #9, the Black Elk Peak Trail, that starts at Sylvan Lake. However, in this post, I’m going to talk about the far less-traveled (and far more difficult) northern portion of this same trail.

It is a little confusing because the names are the same. Be watchful for this (there are signs!)} This portion of the trail is actually shorter than the southern route, but it is far steeper, which is why it is more difficult.

Accessing the Black Elk Peak Northern Route Trailhead

There are a number of ways to access this portion of the trail. One of the easiest is from the Willow Creek Horse Camp off of Route 244. You will find it directly across the road from the Mount Rushmore KOA campground (and around six miles west of Mount Rushmore.

The Willow Creek Trail is an easy and fairly short loop that makes for a great, quick hike. It is only around two miles in length and you can enjoy it in either direction. You will need to start on the Willow Creek Trail to reach the Black Elk Peak Trail which branches off about halfway through the Willow Creek loop.

1st Attempt to Conquer Black Elk Peak, the Hard Way

We’re standing at Black Elk Peak, we’ve been on the trail for five hours, the guidebook we’d consulted said the trail options we chose were only around eight, total miles long. We now KNOW that can’t be right as our GPS says we’re well over five miles into the hike and we’ve only reached the summit. It’s 5 p.m. and…it’s starting to drizzle…

We had used the Lost Cabin trailhead off Palmer Creek Road to ascend the mountain on this attempt. We weren’t sure if we’d make it the whole way or just turn back at some point, but at lunchtime, we were nearly four miles in and the book had said it was only an eight-mile trek so…this is a lesson in listening to your gut. When your guidebook (and/or GPS) say one thing, but while looking at the map and using human logic your gut says another…ALWAYS listen to your gut! 😝

Fortunately, it was Memorial Day weekend so we had guaranteed daylight until 8:30 pm or so, and we had headlamps with us. (This was one of the only, true, “uh oh” moments I’ve ever had on a trail. The thought crossed my mind that we could be facing a long, cold night.).

We did, eventually, make it down safely, and with daylight remaining. We even managed to save one set of dry pants, each, to change into when we got back to the car!

After descending this trail in drier conditions, I’m somewhat impressed we made it down as safely and easily as we did. Water trickles over the large, boulder steps on sunny days, so, on rainy days, it can turn into a veritable river in spots!

The path is steep and technical enough on its own, in the rain and growing darkness, it can get muddy and slippery very quickly–portions of it literally turn into mini-waterfalls from water running down the slope! I thank Mr. Trekker for suppressing my tendency to rush…I hate this trail. 😝

This trail system is a beast! Mr. Trekker and I almost had a dead limb fall on us on another, nearby trail during a hike a few years ago, on a day that wasn’t particularly windy. 😳

A large tree limb lies across a dirt path that meanders through the woods — This big guy is the one that almost fell on us!

See the limb? See the trail? About five minutes before this fell we walked through this area. We then stopped for some lunch and were startled by the “CRASH!” when it fell!

2nd Attempt to Conquer Black Elk Peak’s North Route

It’s a beautiful, sunny day. We began hiking fairly early in the morning. One problem with Trail #9 is its exposure. It used to be fairly shaded…until the pine beetles had their way. That and the resultant logging to lessen the danger of falling, dead trees has culminated in A LOT of sun exposure. Fortunately, a breeze is often present…but not always…

The heat got the Trekkers on this day (especially me). I’ve mentioned before that I don’t do well with heat. We made it about halfway to the summit, to the point where it really starts to get difficult.

I call this “the Boulder Section” because you have to clamber across a long length of boulders while negotiating a rather steep incline–this is the section that becomes mini-waterfalls in wetter conditions.

After this section comes the first phase of mind-numbing switchbacks (that’s right, I said FIRST! 😝) You then proceed to a flatter section, before the final phase of switchbacks, which takes you to the junction with the Black Elk Peak Summit Trail (a short, spur trail).

About the time we reached the “Boulder Section”, I started suffering from stomach cramps and nausea, similar to what I experienced when I became overheated hiking in Glacier National Park several years ago. Due to this, we made the wise decision to turn back…have I mentioned that I HATE THIS TRAIL?! 😩

3rd Attempt…SUCCESS!!!

It’s a, fairly cool, July day (lower 80’s). Earlier that week we had returned from a 10-day trip to the Colorado High Country that I outlined in these four posts. Due to hanging out at 8000 – 10,000 feet throughout that trip, we were especially acclimated to the altitude. (Black Elk Peak, at a little over 7000 feet, is not only the highest peak in the Black Hills, but it is also the highest peak in the country east of the Rockies). I honestly felt in my gut that if I ever hoped to vanquish this monster, this was the time to do it. All conditions were perfect, we were both feeling great and it was a beautiful day!

We made it through the easy, early section with no difficulty. We happily said “hello” to others on the trail, and avoided the occasional “remnant” from horses that had gone before us. 🤥 We reached “the Boulder Section”…my first nemesis. We conquered that fairly easily as well!

Then, we reached the first section of switchbacks. Fortunately, the shade was on our side at that time of the day. It was starting to hurt…but we made it through.

The next section traverses a ridge that parallels Black Elk Peak, so it is fairly flat. This is beneficial as it’s also fairly exposed.

This area affords lovely views of the crags that lord over you from nearby peaks, and the panoramic vistas of the plains to the east (on clear days). Buzzards soar on the thermals high above your head (waiting for beleaguered hikers to falter? 🤔) There are also several, lovely, lookout points along the way that make for a great break/lunch spot. We stopped at a couple, both on the trek up and down the mountain.

Then…we hit the final section of switchbacks. Both of us had just started feeling the altitude a bit (we were pushing 7000 feet at that point). This was the only spot where I started feeling ill. Fortunately, it was still early afternoon and we were in a shaded, quiet area, so we were able to take some time to rest and recover.

And then…

…we began our final push…

…as we rounded one, final switchback…

…and crested one, final rise in the trail…

…we saw a brown sign appear in the distance, indicating our destination was just ahead…

…WE HAD MADE IT!!! 😁

A wooden sign on a wooden post in the woods that reads, "Harney Peak, Tr. 9" and "Sylvan Lake 3.5", both with arrows pointing to the correct direction — My ray of hope, the sign at the top of the trail!

Seriously ya’ll, I almost broke down in tears! I get emotional now, just thinking about it. It had taken us three attempts to conquer this beast!

I maintain this is the toughest trail I’ve ever completed in the entire Black Hills. It has a reputation for being “a doozy”. It’s long, it’s difficult, it’s exposed, and the weather can change at a moment’s notice. Fog and rain can seep in, which is an experience unto itself. (You won’t have the grand vistas that you’ll see on clearer days, but the granite columns materializing through the mist create a spooky gloom that is definitely worth experiencing, just watch your footing!)

Descending the Northern Route of Black Elk Peak

On the way down…we ran out of water (seriously). With the exception of another difficult trek in Glacier National Park, this almost NEVER happens! We usually return with a liter or so left in each of our water bladders.

It was projected to be a fairly cool day and we wanted to limit weight as much as possible– due to the strenuous hike–so we didn’t fill them quite to their max, fill line. I will NEVER make that mistake, in July, again!

Fortunately, by the time we ran out, we were only about 1.5 miles from the trailhead, it was all downhill from there and we had reached the easier portion of the trek. (Also, fortunately, a gas station in Hill City, the nearest town, had LARGE Gatorades for sale! 😜)

Have I mentioned that I HATE this trail?! I don’t think I’ve ever said that about a hike before. I am SO GLAD that we finally beat this brute, but seriously, I don’t know that I’d do it again.

I may consider it with two cars, one parked at Sylvan Lake so you can take the easy route up, and the other parked at Willow Creek trailhead as descending the hard route isn’t too bad…as long as it isn’t raining. 😝 (Or, find a nice friend who will shuttle you between the two points). Or I would try ascending the Lost Cabin trail and descending this one again.

Below are some pics from our day of achievement! 😁 (Thanks, as usual, to Mr. Trekker for some of these!)

View over a forested mountainside with lots of dead trees. At the top of the mountain sits a silhouette of a stone building. — Our first glimpse of the fire tower on the summit!

View over a forested, mountainside vista with lots of dead trees. — My Hills! You can see the sparseness of the foliage in the foreground.

View over a forested, mountainside vista with lots of dead trees. Flatter plains are in the far background through the haze. Random, rock mountains rise from the surrounding forest. — If you look closely, you can see the plains, far in the distance. I “think” one of those rock faces is the backside of Mt. Rushmore! 🤔

View through sparse pine trees of large, craggy rocks, all under a clear, blue sky — This view of the nearby crags is on the first set of switchbacks

A standing, dead, tree trunk that has had the bark and most of the trunk chewed/whittled away in the middle, stands in the sparse forest, all under a clear, blue sky — Not really sure what happened here?! Deer or elk perhaps? Looks like somebody has been gnawing on it!

Conquer Fear by Reaching your Goals

This trail had beaten us twice before, but we had finally defeated it! If we hadn’t already been acclimated to the altitude, it may have won again. This was a personal goal of mine that I had wanted to achieve for years!

This trail had made me sick, it left me with (several) blisters, it hurt me, it caused lingering anxiety to even think of attempting it again, and it pushed the limits of my endurance. But…I beat it!

Reaching this goal was an incredibly empowering, inspiring experience. This was, truly, my “white whale”. It’s hard to express my sense of accomplishment for finally completing this hike. I know others have done it and claim it “isn’t that bad”. I know it’s not a “14-er”, but so what? I don’t hike “14-ers”! 😉 This was a personal goal and desire I had set for myself and I had achieved it! What could be more empowering than that!

I don’t mean to sound like I’m bragging. My point is just that, each person has their own, personal goals, whether they be to learn a new skill, to conquer a specific challenge, etc.

Don’t compare yourself to others. Only be concerned that you push yourself to expand your comfort zone. It doesn’t matter what the goal is, as long as you strive to achieve it and, perhaps, find a way to trounce a few personal demons along the way. 👊

Have you attempted this trail? What other difficult goals have you set for yourself and achieved? Tell me about your experiences in the comments!

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Intro

Welcome to my blog!

I am a 30-something wife and doggy momma who loves being outside, loves to travel and loves the freedom nature provides. I feel spiritually renewed when I’m out in the natural world and find that it’s a calming balm to offset hectic, everyday life. I also struggle with anxiety and find that my love of nature helps to mitigate those symptoms. This blog is meant to share experiences, provide opportunities to discover new adventures and to help others find peace in the natural world that surrounds us.

Enjoy!