notes for a better world Archives : Tranquil Trekker

4 Tips for Digital Mindfulness at Work

In this post, I outline some steps we can all take to be more mindful regarding the use of work laptops, phones, and messaging programs when we’re supposed to be enjoying some “downtime”.

I started a new (more normal) job a few years ago after COVID pretty much killed my freelance career. 😝 I still work from home a lot but I also visit with clients out in the community. Because of this, I now have two laptops and two phones (one each for work and personal use). As you may imagine, this does not lend itself to tranquility, peace, or a dearth of technology in my life.

I’ve felt like the old grandma at work, trying to figure out her grandkids new-fangled technology. 😝 I actually did this same job 10 years ago but back then all I had was a Word document, a flip phone, and a laptop. (It took real effort to locate a WiFi signal anywhere away from the office back then, and there were no hotspots on my flip phones!) Today, almost everything is web-based. While this makes things far more convenient (and saves trees, a definite plus!) it also means there are countless more assessments and paperwork items that are screaming for my attention at all times.

All of this runs completely counter to the mindfulness principles so many of us work so hard to maintain in our lives. We want to be Present in the current moment…we strive to focus our mental energy on one task at a time…and then we’re slammed by multiple devices pinging and dinging with alerts like “you’ve got mail!”, “someone’s calling!”, or “your next meeting starts in 15 minutes!” It’s EXHAUSTING!

So, how do we use these devices as tools to help make our work-life run efficiently, so we can focus our mental and physical energy on what is most important, thereby leaving LOTS of time to live life? Read on for the Tranquil Trekker’s tips for digital mindfulness at work!

Author’s Note: My intent with this post is NOT to complain about my new job. Having a work phone and laptop actually makes a lot of sense with the work I do. My home IS my office. Also, since my job is fairly mobile, it only makes sense that my work is mobile too. I also VERY MUCH appreciate that my company has provided me with work devices as I DON’T want to have to use my own. 😝

And bottom line, SO MANY people are in this same boat. Having multiple devices is really just becoming the new normal (especially with the popularity of flexible work options and the rise in work-from-home due to COVID.) My goal with this post is to encourage people to view these devices as necessary evils and to help them figure out how to use them as beneficial tools without allowing them to take over our lives.

Compartmentalize your Work Devices

Compartmentalize with your work laptop, phone, and any messaging apps if at all possible. You can accomplish this by only having these work-related programs on your work devices. Also, be sure to turn these off at the end of every day and on your days off if possible (I realize this isn’t always an option if you are on-call).

If you feel this isn’t an option in your case, my question would be, are you actually on-call? If not, is there truly an expectation that you respond to calls, emails, or messages during off-hours? To put it bluntly, are you actually jeopardizing your job (or future promotional opportunities) if you don’t respond promptly? Or, is this a self-imposed prison? Is it not actually necessary for you to be available at all times but do you feel like you should be?

Many people have their work email come to their personal phone (even though oftentimes this is voluntary, and is NOT required by their job). I think they’re nuts, personally 😉, but I also can’t help but feel a bit sad for them. They need (and deserve) a break and I just don’t see how this practice achieves that for them.

So my advice is to talk to your boss. Get a clear understanding of what the expectations really are. If the presumption is that you be readily available during off-hours, then you’ll have to decide for yourself if that’s the work environment you want. Just know that studies show you’ll be a better employee if you have true downtime. (Don’t take my word for it, you can read about some of them below! 😉) And if you’re the boss, check out the links and please, don’t be an a-hole! 😇)

Harvard Business Review–The Upside of Downtime
Forbes–Downtime is Important!

Multitasking Makes you Less Productive

In addition to compartmentalizing your work devices, the studies linked below also show that contrary to popular office belief, multitasking DOES NOT work, and it actually DAMAGES your productivity! 😮

Forbes: Multitasking is Bad for You!
Cleveland Clinic: Multitasking Doesn’t Work
Forbes: Multitasking Hurts Productivity

Multitasking is almost NEVER a mindful practice, as mindfulness requires you to put your full mental energy and focus into ONE task at a time. As an example, think about taking a work call while driving (we’re going to assume you’re using hand’s-free devices.) If you’re paying attention to driving (which you should be) you CAN’T be putting all your mental energy and concentration toward the phone call you’re having. And if you’re aren’t focusing on the phone call whatever/whomever you’re trying to serve with that call won’t be getting your best effort. Also, you can’t take notes while driving, or look things up on your computer or phone as you may need to. (I would also ask, how do you pay close attention to driving if you’re distracted by a call?) So all this multitasking scenario succeeds in is making you less of a safe driver while also providing lousier service to your job task at hand. It’s a lose-lose situation!

Prioritize Downtime

Now that I’m back to working more like a normal person, there is nothing better than 5:00 on a Friday, when I log out of my work email, turn my work phone off, close my work laptop, and put all of them (screen down) in the office, not to be looked at for the next several days. I think it’s important that we have that break whenever/wherever we can take it.

That break is important for our mental health and it makes us better workers. It gives us a chance to recharge mentally and physically so we have more mental energy to face the challenges of the job when the next work week comes. I worry this appreciation for the benefits of downtime is something that’s gotten lost in recent years, in our always-on society.

Find Unique Places to Work

This one may be difficult for some people. Depending on the type of work you do you may need to be in front of a video monitor often. Or you may do highly technical work that requires you to be tied down to some sort of office environment. But for many of us, one of the joys of flexible work situations is that you can pick where you want to actually work. So don’t limit yourself to being locked in your home office, the basement, the second bedroom, or wherever you usually work from. If it’s a nice day and you have the internet access you need, work from the front porch or the back deck. Go sit at a local park, beach, or other green/blue spaces. If the Great Outdoors isn’t really your thing, go to a local coffee shop.

Obviously, make certain you are still ensuring all necessary confidentiality your job may require. Use screen protectors so others can’t read your screen, talk quietly if you’re on the phone or seek out private places to talk, or use headphones if you’re in a meeting or a training session (anyone sitting within earshot will appreciate this anyway!)

To Conclude:

This is somewhat of a complex subject as our jobs all vary so greatly in terms of the circumstances that surround them, what our supervisors may require, the security necessary to protect the information we work with, and the practicality of how our jobs function. I just want us all to “think outside the box” when it comes to flexible work options.

One of the best things about these work options is they allow us to get out of the office and better fit our work into the lives we live. So take advantage of this! Set boundaries for when and how you use your work devices. Recognize that while multitasking may make you FEEL more productive, in all likelihood it’s probably, actually hurting your productivity. This isn’t good for your company or the clients you serve.

Also, remember to prioritize your self-care. If you aren’t in a good place it will be almost impossible for you to put your best foot forward in terms of the work you do. Part of this self-care means making your work environment the most pleasurable it can be (while staying within the confines of what is required for your job, of course).

So, the next time you go to grab your work laptop or phone on your “off” hours ask yourself, “Is this really what’s best for me, my client, or my company?” If the answer is likely “no” go do something enjoyable instead!

Do you have any tips for keeping a healthy balance between work and home when your digital, work devices follow you home? Tell me about them in the comments!

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Flight 93 Memorial

In this post, I review the Flight 93, September 11th Memorial in Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

As part of a road trip out East to visit the Trekker In-Laws a few years ago, we visited the Flight 93, September 11th Memorial in Shanksville, Pennsylvania. (For anyone who isn’t aware, United Flight 93 was one of the four planes hijacked by terrorists on September 11, 2001. They believe this one was headed towards the capital when it was brought down by the INCREDIBLY brave passengers who were trying to take control back from the terrorists.)

Author’s Note: I usually try to keep this blog light and carefree. Unfortunately, there is really no way to do that with this post.

I felt like I lost my innocence in a lot of ways on September 11th, 2001. The metaphorical curtain was removed and I saw the depravity, hate, and evil capable in the human spirit. I also felt horrible feelings within myself that I didn’t even know were there. It was the first time in my life I understood how it felt to actually hate another human being, to feel like I wanted to lash out and hurt someone who was responsible for hurting others. When you see innocent people being harmed, dying in horrific ways, knowing that families are being ripped apart, forever altered, it makes you angry. You can’t understand why some people would want to hurt others like that. (As someone who has a degree in human psychology, I can understand that these feelings are perfectly normal as a reaction to such a trauma. It’s still alarming to see those feelings manifested in myself, however.)

The Flight 93 Memorial Visitor’s Center

We started at the Visitor’s Center which was very well done. It highlights the events of September 11th with various video and audio recordings that actually occurred that day (news reports, recordings from air traffic control, even some of the messages people on the planes left with their families–those were particularly heartwrenching.)

View up a green-grass hill at a large, concrete building — The Visitor’s Center at the Flight 93 National Memorial

It was a very emotional experience to visit this memorial, as I assumed it would be. Mr. Trekker and I realized this is the only national memorial we’ve been to that commemorates something that happened in our own lifetime. (I’ve also been to the 9/11 Pentagon Memorial which is very beautiful. We hope to visit Ground Zero at some point in the future, as well.).

I can’t imagine the thoughts and emotions that the people on the plane felt. They knew what was happening and that they were likely to die, so they were facing their own mortality on top of dealing with this attack on their homeland. I have always been awed by their bravery and their final act to try to stop the attack and take control back. I pray I am never in a situation like that.

The memorial brought back memories of that fateful day. Mr. Trekker and I were (barely) freshmen in college, we had only been there a couple of weeks. Funnily enough, that was one of the first times we remember actually spending time together. We went to chapel together with a group of friends that night…

One of the spooky parts of that day for us was our college was located only about an hour from Chicago. A lot of the kids we were in school with were from the Chicago area and they were all worried that the terrorists might be targeting the Sears Tower (now the Willis Tower).

Related Posts: Hershey’s Chocolate World!; Gettysburg Battlefield

This was the first national crisis Mr. Trekker and I had ever lived through, it was definitely a defining moment for our generation. (I realize this is an indication of just how blessed life is for most of us in the US…the fact that we were almost 20 before we had to deal with a crisis like this and that for most Americans, this type of national crisis is a once or twice-in-a-lifetime experience. We are so blessed not to live in a war-torn country!)

This was our “Pearl Harbor moment”. I will never forget where I was or what I was doing that morning, what the weather was like, or how we found out “something” was wrong.

While walking through the memorial I just kept thinking, “I know our country and world are divided right now but man, I can’t contemplate one person having so much hate for another, and for seemingly innocuous reasons. How can you want to kill someone who isn’t posing a risk to you or your family, who is just existing…most if not all of the victims were completely innocent (some were children even!)

The Wall of Names

The Wall of Names is the actual, granite, memorial stone that looks much like many other memorials around the country. It also sits at the bottom of the hill, near the final flight line and boulder that marks the crash site. It features a separate stone for each innocent person killed on the flight with their names engraved in the marble.

View down the length of a long, concrete wall with names written on it — The Wall of Names

Flight 93 Flight Line and Crash Site

The actual crash site sits in a field below and behind the Visitor’s Center. It was once an old mine that scarred the land. Now it is a lovely green area filled with wildflowers, surrounded by trees and accentuated with birdsong. I think it is a perfect memorial to the people who died. I’m glad this former scar on the land got a new lease on life, so to speak.

A green meadow with trees in the background. A line is mowed into a portion of the grass — Flight 93 flight line. The mowed area is the final path the flight took before it crashed into the field.

According to one of the guides we spoke with, the plane hit the ground at over 500 mph with hundreds of gallons of fuel onboard. Needless to say, the resulting explosion left very little behind. So a boulder is used to mark the plane’s final resting place…

A green field with a large boulder at the rear and trees behind — The boulder is the site of the actual crash of Flight 93. No one but the families of the victims are allowed out near it.

Walking Trails at the Flight 93 Memorial

There are several walking trails that ring the field that marks the plane’s final resting place. One is the Avenue of Trees that is a paved trail lined on both sides by trees. It circles one side of the field where the plane crashed and leads from Memorial Plaza, at the bottom of the hill where ceremonies are held, back to the Visitor’s Center. It leads past the 40 Memorial Groves where more than 1500 trees were planted to commemorate the people who died at this site that day.

The Western Overlook Trail is a dirt and grass path that forms the other side of the loop around the field. It runs from the Visitor’s Center down to the actual stone memorial and the crash site itself, and then on to Memorial Plaza at the bottom of the hill.

A paved walkway with trees on both sides — The Avenue of Trees

Tower of Voices

The Tower of Voices is located elsewhere on the monument’s property. It is 93 feet tall (in honor of the flight number) and it features 40 different wind chimes (one for each, innocent person killed on the fateful flight.) It needs at least a 12 mph wind to chime well. It wasn’t ringing much the day we were there but what we heard was pretty. It’s an unusual, haunting, and very subtle sound.

Click here for a video of the chimes in action. (This link takes you to the virtual tour of the site on the Memorial’s main page. Click “Enter” to start the virtual tour, then click on “Tower of Voices” at the upper right corner of the map. Then click the musical note in the upper right corner. Sorry it’s convoluted, this is the best-sounding video I could find.)

A tall, concrete tower with holes throughout and bells hanging from it sits on a grassy hill — The Tower of Voices

View from the bottom of the metal chimes that hang from the tower — A look at the chimes that make up the Tower, from below.

US 30 through Southern Pennsylvania

We brought the scenic, US 30 back from the memorial. This road holds a special place in my heart as it was the same route we drove to college (from home, in Indiana) and I took a portion of it from home to North Carolina when we lived there. It’s funny how certain objects (like roads) can sometimes play a role in our lives. As another example, US 6 ran right near where I grew up. It also ran right through Mr. Trekker’s hometown, even though we grew up almost 800 miles apart. We were connected long before we even knew it! 😀

This is a VERY pretty, country drive. The route curves through forests and over and around hills–I use this term instead of mountains–technically we were in the Appalachian and Allegheny Mountains. HOWEVER, they are thousands of feet shorter than the Black Hills in South Dakota, so I also call these uplifts hills. 😀 (Even though they are almost twice as tall, the Black “Hills” may be called that because they are thousands of feet shorter than their big brothers to the south and west in Colorado, Wyoming, and Montana. 😀)

**Final snarky note (I felt bad putting this further up) 😇 :
People wonder why I don’t like to fly (I’m probably one of the only ‘travel bloggers’ who hates to fly! 😂) I don’t like dealing with airport security (which admittedly has gotten worse since 9/11). I don’t like packing for it, I don’t like having to take my shoes off; I don’t like that flying in a plane is essentially just public transportation where they pack you into a tube, like sardines.

I don’t like that my flight in Michigan can get delayed for HOURS because it’s raining in California and I’m flying to Florida. 🙄 I’m also terrified of the prospect of crashing to my death from 30,000 feet in a fiery tube (and that’s just from good, old-fashioned, mechanical failure, that’s before the idea of terrorists comes into play.) 🙄 All of this is why the Trekkers’ road trip! 😂

I really enjoyed our visit to the Flight 93 Memorial. It is situated in a beautiful setting in the country. It’s peaceful and tranquil, with the tweeting of birds surrounding you. I couldn’t help thinking this would have made me mad if I had been there when the crash happened. How dare the birds tweet happily on this horrible day! 😝 It is a wonderful, final resting place for the people who died on that fateful day, however.

I want to end this patriotic post with my favorite song that came out after 9/11. I still get chills whenever I hear it…Courtesy of the Red White and Blue, by Toby Keith…

Have you been to the Flight 93 Memorial? What was your experience like? Tell me about it in the comments!

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Mindful Thoughts on COVID

In this post, I look back COVID, from my perspective.

In the spring of 2020, the world ended (metaphorically speaking)…it still feels surreal…COVID…I feel like it became a punchline…of the worst joke EVER! 😝 So many people lost income and jobs to the Pandemic (I did), and so many lost their livelihoods. So many people had their lives abruptly changed and for some things may never fully return to normal…

We were lucky out here in South Dakota. We never had any real, state-wide mandates (masks or otherwise). Most people were good about wearing masks during the height of the Pandemic. (You still see people wearing them occasionally. I still wear them frequently for work but that’s because I work with people who are very high risk who also live and spend time in community settings.)

I am still awed at how a minuscule event in one corner of the world could shut the entire globe down…

The majority of the US population now has COVID antibodies (whether through vaccines, natural immunity, or both)

They say that as much as 95% of Americans now have COVID antibodies, whether that be from the vaccines, natural immunity, or both. If I NEVER hear the words “herd immunity” again, it will be too soon! 😤 *sigh*

Mr. Trekker and I have both 😝

Mr. Trekker and I stayed healthy for a long time! We both received our 3rd round of COVID shots in late 2021…and then we both got COVID (probably Omicron) in early January 2022.

I got it from him, we have no idea how he got it. 😝

We didn’t have it too bad, it mostly felt like a bad sinus infection/cold. Interestingly enough, between the two of us, we were more worried about me getting it because I have mild asthma. As it turned out, I hardly had a cough at all, while Mr. Trekker ended up with a mild cough for several weeks afterward…this virus is weird!

I also ended up with mild pinkeye as a side effect of my first round with COVID (apparently that isn’t too unusual with viruses.) Since then, my eyes have become INCREDIBLY sensitive. They’ve always been that way but now, if they get dry from dust or wind, or if I am near any food that could be considered even the teeniest bit spicey, my eyes will begin to burn and water horribly (like to the point where I can’t see out of them. 😝) This is especially true in my right eye which is also the one that had the worse pink eye symptoms.

Then in June 2022, we both got it again…

This time, I’m pretty sure I got it from a client (even though we were sitting outside and she wasn’t symptomatic at the time.)

I then proceeded to pass it on to Mr. Trekker and MommaTrekker. 😔

We were really worried about her as she’s over 70 and has several pre-existing conditions. She had just had a booster a few weeks before though and honestly faired better than either of us!

This time it didn’t last as long and the symptoms weren’t as severe. Unfortunately, we both ended up with a cough that lasted WEEKS and more lasting Long COVID symptoms from this round–mostly brain fog and memory issues.

Again…*sigh*

I HATE this virus! 😡

Mindfulness in the Midst of a Worldwide Pandemic

I try and keep a somewhat positive outlook on the whole experience by being mindful of how the pandemic ACTUALLY played out vs. how the experts feared it might end up.

There were more than one million deaths in the US from COVID-19, and millions more worldwide, and to be clear, EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. of these was awful! However, when the whole mess started the experts were projecting more than two million deaths in the US alone, before the end of 2020, and that was with social distancing protocols being implemented.

I don’t mean to make light of the tragic losses that did occur, but this FAR lower statistic is a pretty amazing feat! It is a testament to the scientists, researchers, medical professionals, and technology we have available to us at this point in history! If this awful virus had come around 100 years ago or more, billions could have died! (Think the Spanish Flu.)

Valid Emotions During Crisis Situations:

We all experience and respond to crises differently but I think it’s important to acknowledge that whatever feelings you had regarding COVID were valid. We should be mindful of how we express them but don’t run from these emotions (be they positive or negative). Accept them and acknowledge they exist (because they will whether you fight them or not). We must allow ourselves to feel whatever it is we need to. Below are some emotions I experienced throughout COVID:

Anger About the Pandemic:

—Hoarding: Many people seemed to think only of themselves and didn’t save enough products for others (some who were seniors or the immune-compromised who really shouldn’t have been going out). If you aren’t the Duggars, or you aren’t buying toilet paper for multiple families, you don’t need to hoard! 😡

On the other hand, we were told not to hoard, but then the CDC and other emergency preparedness groups came out and said to have up to a month’s supply of food on hand…what were we supposed to do with those two bits of contradictory information? 🤷

Leave people alone!: I never understood many peoples’ desires to comment on the choices of others. I’ve said before on several occasions that I lean Libertarian so I’m pretty big on people being left alone to make their own choices. However, I do understand in crisis situations when at least local governments may need to implement certain restrictions in the interest of Public Health.

More so than that though, I don’t understand peoples’ need to criticize others for wearing a mask or being careful when the general public is no longer being forced to. You have no idea what a person’s situation is. Just because they wear a mask doesn’t necessarily mean they’re “living in fear” (and if they are, so what, how does that affect you?) They may be immunocompromised (or be caring/living with someone who is.)

There was a point, several years into the pandemic, where I was preparing for–and recovering from–MAJOR abdominal surgery that required a multi-day hospital stay. I wore masks for WEEKS in public around that time. It wasn’t that I was “scared” per se, but I did NOT want to get sick with ANYTHING! It could have led to my surgery being delayed, my getting horrifically ill, or serious complications after surgery due to violent coughing/sneezing/vomiting.

So, why not just leave people alone to do what they feel is best for them? (And you can do the same for yourself?)

—The Media: I often felt a sense of rage at the news media. I’ve distrusted them in the past but after COVID I’ve become completely jaded–regarding the virus and most other news-worthy issues. They seemed to mislead at every turn if it could cause controversy. (I probably shouldn’t be surprised anymore but I still am at points.)

I’d read a clickbait headline that makes one claim and then goes on to almost disprove itself if you read the actual text of the article, or watch the entirety of the video clip they referenced in the article. They weren’t openly lying, because there was a semblance of truth in what they said, but their claim was so far from the truth that it may as well have been a lie with the message they were proclaiming to the masses (and for the record, I don’t care which news source is your favorite, I’ve seen ALL of them do this.)

They seemed to take pleasure in reporting bad news and stirring people up. They didn’t take the time to fully research information, that would apparently have taken too long. 🙄 It seemed to be more important that they were “the first” to break a story. The really shameful thing was, that I don’t believe they cared. They just went happily along reporting bad news every chance they got because it may have helped a reporter’s career or a certain company’s reputation.

Depression and Anxiety over COVID:

Anyone who reads this blog regularly knows I already struggle with anxiety (which obviously, COVID caused for many of us.) One symptom of anxiety is catastrophizing. This means your mind automatically jumps to worrying about the worst-case scenario and that was SO EASY to do during COVID.

I believe I’m technically an optimist at heart. I try to focus on the positive (although I worry about the worst-case scenario, of course, especially with my anxiety). But it just felt like, during the Pandemic, that so many only wanted to focus on the worst thing that could happen and they wanted to scream that to the world. Why? Why do we seem to focus on things that make ourselves and others miserable?

We need to rely on Logic, not Emotion during these difficult situations! I believe we have to be calm and logical when dealing with times like these. I don’t mean to sound snarky, but why can’t people stay rational when things get difficult without immediately jumping to APOCOLYPSE?! It feels like they’re pouring salt into an already raw, gaping wound…

COVID may be with us for a while…

The COVID pandemic isn’t over yet, unfortunately. I’m starting to think it will NEVER be “fully” over, at least not for the next few decades. I hold out hope that we’ll be able to remain living relatively normal lives, but now I fear that regular vaccines (and perhaps even regular–hopefully mild–infections) are going to remain a part of “normal” life. 😕

At one time I was hopeful that we were on our way out of this mess. Now that I’ve done everything right (at least regarding getting my vaccines) and we STILL got COVID (TWICE!)–AND we’ve got Long-COVID symptoms I’m more skeptical…

I believe in science. I believe it’s very possible the reason neither of the Trekkers got all that sick from this potentially deadly disease was due to our vaccines. I also believe the reason none of our parents have gotten very ill from COVID is due to vaccines. And I am VERY thankful for these!

But when we got sick 1 MONTH after getting our boosters I just felt…DONE. I think, at that moment, I just gave up. It’s here, it isn’t going away, and we have to learn to live with it….THE END. 😪

I understand the vaccines probably worked as intended and those in our families who have had COVID while vaccinated came through relatively unscathed. But we still got it, and I’m assuming if another variant (maybe one not related to Omicron) develops, we will likely be at risk of at least mild disease from that. So, this is our “new normal”.

We will probably have at least annual vaccines with the threat of at least occasional, mild illness always looming…possibly for the rest of our lives…it sucks but I just feel like that’s what we have to adjust to and accept for the foreseeable future. *sigh*–again!

Searching for Hope and Encouragement in Crisis Situations

I have to end this post on a good note, right?

I can’t help it. Even with my learned helplessness after years of being beaten down by COVID, I still feel a glimmer of hope.

COVID was a unique time in our lives. Many of us have never experienced something like this before. As a (very OLD) Millenial, the only country-wide crisis I’ve really had to deal with was the September 11th terrorist attacks.

I grew up hearing stories about my grandparents’ generation dealing with World War II, the rationing of meat, the transitioning of factories to make equipment for the military, and the various drives people engaged in at home for the “war effort”. I always wondered what it would be like to be able to do something like that to help your country. Now I know…

Through all this, I’ve been reminded that there is a lot of good in the world, and times like these are when it really shows.

A lot of good things DID happen! Vaccines were produced in an unheard-of, record time. So many people bound together to help each other get through this crisis, from wearing masks and social distancing in public to those who volunteered their time to make masks for local schools and hospitals. Others ran errands for people who felt they couldn’t go out. Some small businesses transitioned to help their local communities (like distilleries that stopped producing alcohol and started producing hand sanitizer instead.)

I think a lot of the world’s goodness was shown throughout COVID. I know I’ve learned a lot, both about myself and also about the reality of country-wide/worldwide crises: how they proceed, how people react to them, the good and the bad.

So there are things to be hopeful about regarding COVID!

What did the COVID crisis feel like to you? What POSITIVE things did you see during this time of crisis? Share your experiences in the comments!

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Give Wildlife Room to Roam

In this post, I discuss the need to respect wildlife and give them their space.

Public Service Announcement! I apologize in advance, this post is going to be a bit of a rant. 😇

Every year tourists come to our beautiful corner of South Dakota. They visit some of our amazing locations like Wind Cave National Park and Custer State Park. Many of these visitors aren’t used to some of the exotic wildlife we have here.

Many of them have only seen domesticated animals in their pens, or have only seen wild animals if it’s been behind the safety of cages or other dividers in places like zoos. Out West, we have national and state parks where there’s nothing between you and the MASSIVE, POWERFUL, and VERY WILD animals except a little bit of oxygen. So let’s talk about giving wildlife room to roam!

Every year you hear of people getting attacked by deer, elk, or bear (especially in places like Yellowstone National Park.) Oftentimes they’ll get charged or gored by buffalo which especially, seem to be problematic and tempting for visitors. They look like domesticated cows…note to self, THEY AREN’T! They are strong, they have INCREDIBLY HARD AND POWERFUL heads, and oh yeah, they have SHARP HORNS!…even the females.

It’s pretty well known that Mommas of any species can get quite aggressive when defending their babies. (I’m not a human Momma but Puppers is my baby and I will go into full Momma Grizzly mode if someone or something tries to hurt her. 😝 ) Oftentimes, mother animals are the ones that can pose the greatest risk to us, or our dogs. Even neighborhood deer have been known to act aggressively when they think their young are in danger.

We all need to remember that when we go out in the wild, we are invading the animals’ homes. Let’s be courteous guests and treat this natural beauty with the respect it deserves! If an animal reacts to you in any way, YOU ARE TOO CLOSE! It doesn’t matter if you think you’re giving them plenty of space or if you “aren’t even doing anything”. If the animal reacts to you that’s his way of telling you that you need to back off, and that should be the end of the story.

So the next time you’re visiting one of these amazing locations or interacting with wild animals in any setting, take it from a local (and heed the advice of the MANY signs that are posted ALL OVER these types of parks)…#dontpetthefluffycows! 🙄 We are supposed to be the superior species in regards to mental prowess, after all, so let’s act like it, please! 😝

Do you have any suggestions for enjoying the beauty of wild animals while also giving them space? Let me know what they are in the comments!

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Microadventures: Fun Close to Home!

In this post, I review a recent adventure the Trekkers pursued, “chasing” the Neowise comet!

I’m going on a Microadventure!

What is a Microadventure?

“Microadventure” is a term that’s come about in recent years. It basically means you’re going on an adventure that’s close to home, easily accessible, and can be completed in as little as a few hours. It can range from anything from a Saturday picnic in the woods to a several-day long camping trip. It can be enjoyed at any time, though it became increasingly popular during Covid when many people were choosing to save some money, and to not venture too far from home.

Microadventures are a great way to find the hidden gems to enjoy in your local community and region. They’re especially helpful as an escape from everyday stress and burnout when you may not have the time, funds or vacation days for a lengthy trip.

The Trekkers live for microadventures, be those outdoor activities in the Black Hills, or storm chases in the nearby plains!

One of our favorites was several years ago when we “chased” Neowise, the comet that made a surprise appearance in the skies above us!

This wasn’t the first comet I’ve seen in my life. I’m old enough to remember standing outside my childhood home, in the 1990s, with my mom one night, checking out the Hale-Bopp comet through the binoculars.

How do I find a microadventure near me?

It helps that we live in a beautiful place that makes these opportunities many and easy to find, though you can enjoy these types of activities in most places if you know where to look. Go to your local community park or just take a drive in the country outside the city lights. So many places have walking paths and greenways now, even in more urban areas. There are also museums, historical and natural sites, and additional recreational activities, such as ropes courses to explore.

We actually started our chasing adventure on Skyline Drive, which traverses the ridgeback that splits the town of Rapid City in two. Unfortunately, the light pollution from town made it difficult to see the comet. A few evenings later we visited Badlands National Park, with MommaTrekker and Puppers in tow.

Badlands National Park, by-the-way, is one of the best places to view the night sky that I’ve ever seen. As the park’s location is the epitome of the “middle-of-nowhere” and being that this area is more arid, where clear skies are a common occurrence, this is a place with very little light pollution where you can view the night sky in all its grandeur. It helped that the night we went, the moon wasn’t up yet.

My mom agreed that she had never seen so many stars, and she’d spent the last 40 years living on a farm in Indiana! Several different constellations, planets, and the Milky Way were also easily visible to the naked eye. I can also attest, from previous experience, that this is a GREAT place to view meteor showers! 😮

Several days later, we finished our adventure with a short drive to Pactola Lake which is about a half-hour to the west of Rapid City.

Whether you don’t have much spare time, you prefer sticking closer to home, or if you’re trying to save a little on expenses, try out a microadventure. See what you can discover near you!

What sorts of activities do you enjoy on your microadventures? Tell me about them in the comments!

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Easter Ends the Lenten Fast!

In this post, I discuss the success of my annual, Lenten Fast.

Happy Easter everyone! The Tranquil Trekker survived another Lenten season–this time with Mr. Trekker participating too! (The Trekker marriage survived too! 😉) Easter, which falls on Sunday, always perks me up as it marks the end of the annual, six-week-long, Lenten Fast.

How did this year’s Lenten Fast go?

I felt like the Fast went pretty well this year. I opted out of doing it last year as I was recovering from major surgery and I found I really missed it. So, I was really looking forward to it this year. (As it turned out, I was unexpectedly recovering from surgery again this year too 😝, but I decided I wanted to do the Fast anyway!) I am actually VERY proud of Mr. Trekker. He stuck to the Fast and was exceptionally non-cranky–especially for a First Timer!

Elements from my Lenten Fast that I’ll maintain going forward

As per usual, I think this year I’ve also figured out a technique or two to enjoy the junk food I crave, but within healthier limits. The goal is maybe these few, simple changes will result in continued lower weight for myself!

I will enjoy breaking my lengthy fast on Easter morning with some naughty and delicious sweet treats! 🤤 I’m also looking forward to dessert after Easter dinner!

Related Posts: Low-carb Lent; Final Thoughts on Low-Carb Lent; A Sustainable Low-carb Lifestyle; My Lenten Fast

It’ll be nice to be able to eat without restrictions again, though I am hoping to continue implementing some of my healthier eating habits. This will mainly be in the form of:

- - A more mindful approach to drinking soda (this is always an onging challenge for me): I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I love soda, L-O-V-E LOVE it! (and I’m talking the full-sugar stuff here. That diet stuff tastes like crap, is AT LEAST as bad for you as the regular version–maybe worse?–and it triggers my IBS). I want to be more mindful about how I drink it though. As an example, save the liquid calories for the Mcdonald’s Dr. Pepper (and Sweet Tea!) that are the best out there–in my opinion–they just are. So…don’t bother getting these drinks anywhere else, just go with what you like (it also doesn’t hurt that they are some of the cheapest sodas available! 😇)
    Also, drinking LESS junk! During the peak of summer, when it’s all hot and nasty out, nothing tastes better than a cold, LARGE, drink…until 2 AM when I can’t sleep because of the caffeine (that’s a new, fun addition to hitting 40! 😝). Plus, the MEDIUM drinks fit better in my insulated cup to stay cold so…I also know from past experience, that just making the switch from large to medium drinks helps me lose weight (or at least keep the weight off some.) 😁
  - I want to be more intentional about eating junk food in general. It’s ok to eat it but only if it is something I am REALLY craving, not just something to fill my belly with. There are also some things I know make me not feel well. So, I will avoid these things in favor of healthier options (or at least junk that doesn’t make me feel so bad.)
  - We will continue sticking with our lower-salt, DASH diet as much as is reasonable: This diet is hard because nothing tastes right. It turns out salt plays a HUGE part in the way we think the foods we eat “should” taste. But I am “slowly” learning how to add just enough salt to home-cooked meals so that they taste good, without using the MASSIVE amounts of the mineral that are in normal, processed food (this includes pizza crust, bread, salad dressings, low/no-salt canned foor, etc.)

To Conclude

So, Happy Easter everyone! I’m off to go enjoy some dessert, soda, and a few jelly beans! 🤤 😁 Here’s to another year of trying to implement more healthy eating practices!

Did you participate in a Lenten Fast? How did it go? Tell me about it in the comments!

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Spring Forward: Daylight Saving Time

In this post, I discuss how my SAD symptoms decrease with the time change.

It’s that time of year again! We push our clocks forward one hour this weekend (in the US at least)! I know people hate the time change and I know many people have good reasons for feeling that way. (It has even been proven to mess up your sleep.) I actually love time change day (in the spring)! It is the day my SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) dies ya’ll!

For those of us in the Northern Plains, the time change really does make the best use of our daylight hours that fluctuate wildly throughout the year. If we stayed on Standard Time all year, it would start getting light at 3:30 am in the summer (no joke). Whereas if we stayed on Daylight Time all year, it wouldn’t get light till after 8 am in the winter. I’m not ok with either of these options.😝 So, I will firmly remain #teamtimechange.

Winter passed quickly

I am always amazed at how quickly the dark winter actually flies by. It always goes more quickly than I think (worry) it will. I’ve been VERY fortunate that my SAD has been super mild for the past few years. I’ve hardly been noticing it at all! It may be a fortunate side effect of my taking high doses of Vitamin D3 for the last several years. It helps that we’ve had fairly mild winters in recent years, too.

Other Vitamin D3 options: Nature’s Bounty, Nature Made 2000 IU tablets, NOW softgels

SAD symptoms end with the time change

I am always amazed at how much better I feel once my SAD symptoms start to ebb. It really gives you an appreciation for how strongly they affect your life. You don’t always notice it while you’re experiencing them. You know that everyone seems to be keen to IRRITATE THE HELL OUT OF YOU! (must they swallow so loudly?! 😂) And you can’t help the tears that come when EVERYTHING YOU TRY TO DO FAILS MISERABLY!!! (Why am I the only one whose life is so difficult?! 🙄😉)

I hope it’s obvious that I’m being sarcastic with these statements. In all seriousness though, I find it amazing how my SAD symptoms cast a shadow on every other aspect of my life. Even though I personally experience it, it’s hard to believe it can cloud your judgment so much on whatever thing you’re dealing with at any given moment. Every problem seems 10x worse when SAD is already weighing you down. Any other stressor you feel is amplified.

As someone who struggles with anxiety throughout the year, the SAD worsens those symptoms, as well. I am a master champion at catastrophizing future events that I’m worried about on a good day. When I’m dealing with SAD, as well, that ability becomes a superpower. 🙄😝

Every fall I swear, I’m not going to let SAD affect me as much this year. I know what’s coming, I know how to deal with it, I know it WILL END, I just have to get through it…and then every spring I’m back to, “Wow! Was all that extra angst I was feeling JUST from my SAD?” Maybe someday I will learn. 😐

Related posts: Summer Solstice: The Longest Day; Therapy Lamp and Calm App Reviews; I HATE Seasonal Depression!; Enjoying the Winter Solstice; Increasing Daylight as Winter Wains

Take back your power from SAD

Our brains are powerful tools, and they can allow our imaginations to run away with themselves if we permit them. While its important to always be patient and understanding with ourselves, it’s also important to try to reign in the negative thoughts, especially when we can speak the name of the demon they come from (“SAD”). By doing so we can help to lessen its control over us. Fortunately, we CAN control that demon, and it’s time to take our power back!

Do you find the time change affects your mood? Tell me about it in the comments!

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Stay Mindful by Using a Smartphone Purposefully

In this post, I discuss ways to lead a more mindful lifestyle by using technology as a tool rather than as entertainment.

Mr. Trekker and I are pretty good about not being glued to our phones. We have a standing rule at our house that there are no phones at the dinner table (with the exception of emergencies/family situations or, sometimes, when making travel plans on the run).

We’ve actually had strangers comment to us (in a good way) how unusual it is to see two people sitting together at a restaurant just talking to each other, with neither of us being on our phones. They always seem so impressed. I hope, by this small act, I can inspire other people to use their smartphones purposefully, as well.

My Week Without a Smartphone

A while back, I lost the use of my phone for almost a week. 😮 I was reminded of what life was like before we all had computers at our fingertips at all times. 🙄

It was due to this weird situation where Verizon pushed an update through and that basically “broke” my cellular ability. So I could use apps when I was connected to a WiFi network, but that was it. I couldn’t make any phone calls AT ALL (which is ironic since wasn’t that the whole point of having phones to begin with?!) After troubleshooting several things I decided that my phone was shot.

Fortunately, I have a warranty so I was able to get a free replacement from Apple. It was the same, old model I already had, and it had a crappy camera that took pictures with pink backgrounds 🙄 but at least it worked. I didn’t want to spend the money on a whole new phone at the time (we had literally just bought one for Mr. Trekker a few weeks before) so this was a good enough replacement.

On a personal note, my local Verizon store was FAR more helpful in dealing with this issue than Apple was over the phone. (The nearest Apple store is almost 400 miles away, in Denver). I’ve had good luck with Apple customer service in the past, but the Verizon store won this round! Apple seemed somewhat confused as to what exactly was wrong with the phone. Even though they told me not to bother with the local store because “the carriers don’t deal with this issue” Verizon was able to understand my problem and diagnose it almost immediately. This potentially saved me $100’s in replacement costs!

Remember the days before Smartphones?

It was weird to be thrown back to a life without a smartphone. I appreciated the break from the constant temptation to check social media or email while doing mundane things like standing in line at the store.

I did feel very isolated though, and cut off from the world. I could contact people via Facebook Messenger if I had a WiFi signal, but I couldn’t text. We haven’t had a landline phone in over a decade so, even at home, I realized I had no way to make a call to 911 if it was needed (fortunately it wasn’t). It was humbling and frustrating.

Part of me would love to throw all this tech garbage away and just go back to an old-fashioned “dumb” phone. I used to love my old flip phones, where I could send a quick text message or write a simple note to myself. I could even take the occasional picture (if it was REALLY important because they were EXPENSIVE!)

I could *gasp!* call someone (or have them call me) if we needed to get in touch. I really miss those simple days, they feel so 2006-ish! (Yeah, I didn’t get a cell phone of any kind until after I graduated college in 2005, told ya I was old-school! 😉)

How to Use a Smartphone Mindfully

Smartphones do have their benefits. They’re pretty handy when I’m away from my computer and need to make an update to my blog or handle other work-related business. A portion of my livelihood is made via the internet so having access to my blog, social media, and email (let alone old-school phone calls) from almost anywhere means I can be far more productive with my freelance work (and it gives me far more freedom to be away from home–the office).

I read the book Digital Minimalism, by Cal Newport, recently as research for another project I’m working on. It was a very interesting read! I’d recommend this for anyone who feels technology has too much control over their life.

In the book, he stresses using technology, such as phones and social media, as minimally as possible to pursue more fulfilling things in life. I don’t feel like I struggle as much as many of the people he discusses in the book, so I didn’t feel the need to implement all of his strategies. However, the book did help me to structure my free time better and prioritize things I really care about.

I pride myself on not being a technophile, but this book really brought home to me the importance of using technology as a tool rather than as a device for entertainment. (It made me think we should view it almost like a pen or a drill, that is needed solely to complete a task.)

As an example, rather than scrolling through my Twitter or Facebook feed, I strive to only check a few, individual people who I follow. This helps me stay up-to-date with family and friends who live far away. I also check a few, specific, news sites so that I remain in-the-know on current events.

There are also a few, individual groups that I am a part of that help me to achieve my blogging and writing goals (I rank these under Professional Development). That’s it. If I’m not using my phone or social media for those purposes, I try not to use it at all.

There are always other free-time options to pursue. I’ve got a stack of books I’m working my way through, I’m also still enjoying the Star Wars, adult coloring book Mr. Trekker got me for Christmas several years ago, and I’ve got other projects to keep me busy.

Our lives are hectic enough! I challenge you to look for ways to reduce your smartphone use. Maybe instead you could interact with some flesh-and-blood humans 😉; take a walk, read a book, or go throw a baseball with your kiddo (or a tennis ball for your pup!) Let’s try to be more mindful and purposeful when using our smartphones!

What do you think? Have you seen any benefit from being more mindful with the use of your phone? Let me know in the comments!

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Samelius Trail: North on the Black Hills Centennial Trail

In this post, I review the hike on the Centennial Trail from the Samelius Trailhead, heading north to Sheridan Lake.

One interesting hike that is part of the Black Hills Centennial Trail runs from the Samelius Trailhead heading north, toward Sheridan Lake.

This entire section is around seven miles in total length, one-way, we only did about half of that. We have plans to complete the other half, from Sheridan Lake heading southward, at another time.

Hiking North from the Samelius Trailhead

The Centennial Trail runs in two directions from this trailhead, northbound towards Sheridan Lake and south, to the vicinity of Mount Rushmore and Horsethief Lake. These are both decent hikes. We’ve only completed a small portion of the southbound route, so I’ll leave that review for another day.

I would give the hike north on the Samelius Trailhead a moderate rating. The first mile or so it follows an old, forest road so the path is wide, though it’s a fairly steep, uphill climb. From there it ventures back into the woods on a one-track trail. Portions of it are quite rugged as they traverse the rocky landscape that is common in the Black Hills.

This route won’t take you to the summits of any of the major, nearby mountains on its own. There are several in the local area that you can climb to though, if you’re daring enough to trek off-trail. Mt. Samelius is one of these.

This section of the Centennial Trail isn’t quite as scenic as some other parts of the route. It’s a nice hike, you can occasionally catch glimpses of various portions of the Black Hills, and the prairies that stretch beyond them, through the trees. However, for the most part, it is just a rambling, rolling hike through the Black Hills National Forest–albeit a very pleasant one!

After the initial ascent on the forest road, the path levels out into more moderate ups and downs as you traverse the nearby Hills. The path can be challenging, so you need to watch your step (as I found out when I made a misstep on a small rock….)

I should have named myself the Clumsy Trekker. 🙄 I rolled my ankle the worst I ever have less than a mile into the hike. At first, it didn’t seem that bad. It really didn’t hurt and there wasn’t any real evidence of bruising or swelling, so I decided to continue on. After we stopped for lunch at our turnaround point is when the stiffness and pain really settled in and I realized I may have pushed on too far. (Of course, we were also several miles from the truck at that point. 😝 ) Fortunately, Mr. Trekker fashioned a perfect hiking pole, for me, out of a downed tree branch we found nearby. It made the trip back far more bearable for my ankle.

We were able to catch a few shots of Black Elk Peak (formerly Harney Peak) and the Cathedral Spires from the trail. Where we stopped for lunch we were also treated to a great view of a portion of the–then frozen–Sheridan Lake.

Expansive view over mountains covered in pine trees. A tiny portion of a frozen lake is in the background. — If you look closely in the background, you can see a portion of the frozen, Sheridan Lake.

The steepest part of the trail we encountered was near its middle. We hiked to the top of an unnamed peak and enjoyed a windy snack while peering out over the Hills. In addition to catching a glimpse of Sheridan Lake, we also spotted the prairies that extend east of the Hills.

Don’t Hike Alone and Always Bring Extra Gear

My ankle injury is another good example of why I stress that it isn’t safe to hike alone. This isn’t always a popular opinion but I stand behind it. It is always astounding to me how quickly accidents can happen on the trail, and how silly things can cause them. 😔

I didn’t fall (this time) or slip on ice, I can’t even blame the dog for pulling on me too much. We were just walking down a dry section of trail that was relatively flat. It happened to be a bit rocky and I stepped on one of the rocks protruding from the ground wrong, which turned my ankle. Unfortunately, my momentum was already carrying me forward so I proceeded to–heavily–put my full weight on that ankle, and felt a *pop!* (not to mention numbing shocks running from my ankle bone up my shin and down my foot). 😝

Some may argue that my decision to continue hiking was unwise, and they may have a point. The Trekkers have had some First Aid training so we implemented what we learned. The pain subsided fairly quickly, I had full range of motion with my foot and I could put my full weight on it. This suggested I wasn’t hurt too badly and this wasn’t the first time I’ve sustained an injury like this on the trail. (I have a tendency to underpronate when I walk so this happens easily and regularly to me.)

We examined the ankle and it showed no signs of visible swelling or bruising. Since it wasn’t really a struggle to continue hiking I decided to press onward. Some of this was also pure stubbornness. We’ve attempted this trail several times before and have never gotten very far as it always seems to start thundering. We knew that wasn’t going to be an issue today and I really wanted to continue on and keep enjoying the warm weather, so I chose to plod on.

Bruise on inner ankle — The final result of my injury 😝

As we slowly made our way back to the car, I couldn’t help thinking how things would have been different if it had been just me on the trail. I probably could have gotten back on my own, we weren’t that far out and I wasn’t hurting that badly. However, if it had been just me and the (barely) one-year-old, rambunctious pup…

I did ok navigating the route on my own with a walking stick, but if I had needed to be tethered to an energetic pup in addition, that feat would have been far more difficult (especially if the injury had occurred farther along on the trail where the terrain became more strenuous). So I’ll say it again folks, DON’T VENTURE INTO THE WILD ALONE (and no, your incredibly adorable four-legged companion does NOT count as a hiking partner). 😐

This incident also further demonstrated to me why it’s important to ALWAYS bring extra gear. I almost didn’t bring a warm coat that day, just to save weight and space. Even though it was February 1st the forecast was calling for near 70-degree temperatures (not that unusual to have these warm days occasionally in the Black Hills in the winter!) and I knew this hike wasn’t exceptionally difficult. I did end up–wisely–including my winter “puffy” coat at the last minute, as it’s super light and packs well. I just couldn’t bare the thought of not bringing it along in the middle of winter, just in case.

As it turned out, I didn’t end up using the coat. HOWEVER, if my injury had been worse to the point where I had needed to wait for rescue, I easily could have become chilled and potentially even hypothermic if I hadn’t had a warm coat with me (I was sweaty and it was a breezy day).

Accidents can happen on the trail in a split second folks, and it doesn’t have to be in wet, slippery, cold, or even difficult conditions. A fun walk through the woods on a warm day can become a rescue scenario in a matter of seconds. Please, learn from my experience, and ALWAYS BE PREPARED!!!

To Conclude

Don’t worry, it only took about a week for me to recover from my injury. This is good because I’m TERRIBLE at sitting around and resting. 😉

If you’re looking for a little tougher hike and you want to explore a lesser-known trail in the Black Hills, check out the Samelius Trailhead and have your pick of two portions of the Centennial Trail.

Have you ever hurt yourself while out hiking? Did you learn anything from the experience? If so, let me know in the comments!

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A Very Trekker Christmas

In this post, I discuss some of my happiest memories from Christmas, as well as some new traditions the Trekkers have started.

Happy Christmas everyone!

This has always been one of my favorite holidays, so on this Christmas Eve Day I thought I’d reflect on some holiday memories from my childhood, and some new traditions that Mr. Trekker and I have been implementing into our own, little family.

Trekker Family Traditions

Family Christmas traditions are funny, and growing up, my family was no exception. Time for a bit of a confession…I never really believed in Santa (shocking, I know 😮). Some people think that’s sad, but I was always richly blessed during this time of the year, so I never felt like I missed out on much. Below are some of the reasons why I went without this holiday tradition:

1) We didn’t have a fireplace growing up, so even as a child, my overly logical, skeptical mind was like, “ummm…how would that work?”

2) My mom always put presents under the tree when she was done wrapping them. I’m not sure how this got started, but to me, a tree looks naked if there are no presents under it (and yes, I still do this too.)

Also, I always helped her shop for, and wrap, presents for my cousins, so I kinda figured that if she was “Santa” for them…it’s pretty obvious who Santa was for me! 😉

Also, also, inevitably, I always ended up finding one of my presents before the big day and it was ALWAYS on accident (truly!) One year, my mom sent me to her closet to get something for her, completely forgetting one of my unwrapped presents was hidden in there! 😂

3) I grew up in a very religious family, especially on my dad’s side, so that aspect of the holiday was always stressed more than Santa or the gifts (Grandpa and Uncle were pastors after all 😉). I think this was good though, as it always helped me to keep the commercialism of the holiday in perspective.

One tradition we had for a few years, when the kids were young, is to have a birthday cake for Baby Jesus on Christmas Eve. We even got to sing “Happy Birthday” to Him (and there was cake so…😁!) I think that is such a cool tradition. It’s a fun way to help keep the true meaning of Christmas front-and-center for kids!

A box of Queen Anne cordial cherries sits on a table — Not everyone likes these sweet treats (I do!) but they represent a special memory for me. We would have them every year at my Grandma’s house at Christmas!

4) Most of my Christmas memories from my childhood are from the BIG gatherings we used to have at my grandparents’ house on Christmas Eve. The WHOLE family (we’re talking like 20 people) would gather there, with mounds of presents stacked everywhere. After dinner, we always dressed in our best (I usually got a pretty, new dress each year, several times my mom even made them!) and we went to the Christmas Eve church service, which has always been my favorite of the whole year!

The church would be decked out in beautiful lights and decorations, and it would always end with a moving version of “Silent Night”, lit only by candlelight. Then, the lights would be brought back up, and while we basked in the acrid, sulphuric smoke that wafted from the tips of the blown-out candles (I LOVE that smell), we’d be sent off to a rousing rendition of “Joy to the World!”

Then we’d return to Grandma’s house for…PRESENTS! (This is probably another reason why I never believed in Santa. 😂)

The story my grandfather told me for starting the tradition of opening gifts on Christmas Eve was that my mom and her three siblings used to wake my grandparents up REALLY early on Christmas morning to open presents (of course). The “old folks” didn’t like it, so…they started opening presents Christmas Eve instead, so they could sleep in Christmas morning! 🤣 (To be fair, my mom disputes this story. 😂) I always thought I was lucky, all the other kids had to wait a whole other sleep to get their presents, HA! 😉

Changing Holiday Traditions

As an adult, the holidays always seem a little weird, especially when you move far away and only return home occasionally. They say you “can’t go back again” and in many ways this is true. The experience is never quite the same as the rose-colored memories you have from childhood.

I have SO MANY amazing memories associated with this holiday. I find these days though, my feelings are somewhat bittersweet. I still LOVE all the shiny lights, carols, the beauty and peace of a candlelit church service, and time spent with family…but Christmas doesn’t quite feel the same as I remember as a kid. For the last 20 years, things have been changing, as all of us “kids” have been moving out (and away) and getting busy with our own lives.

You watch once-vibrant grandparents and parents age, slow, and eventually, one year, become only a memory…so all the memories made with them start to dim, as well.

It just never quite feels the same as the days when Grandma would crawl around on the floor with us kids, with silly string in her hair. One year the tree fell over on her as she rooted around for that last Christmas present (true story, there is video evidence of this somewhere! 😁)

A grandma lays on the floor laughing and playing with two grandchildren amongst wrapping paper — This is my favorite pic of that crazy lady, it shows her in her element…with her grandchildren. This was Christmas, circa 1986, and yes, that brown mop of hair you see on the left would be me.

Relatives or childhood friends you were once almost inseparable from, you may now find you have little to talk about outside the updates you’re already aware of from social media. While some family members are lost, new ones are added (both through marriage and birth). While these are, certainly, blessings, the additional people–and their responsibilities to their own families–create complexities of their own.

Traditions change. What used to be a gathering at Grandma’s house, of what seemed like 100 people (when you were 5), is now a smaller group sitting around another table, or even gathering at a restaurant where you can pay a stranger to cook for you and clean up afterwards! 😉

It’s almost impossible to get everybody together at the same time anymore. Everyone lives all over the country (sometimes all over the world!) and we’re all busy with our own families (and families-in-law). Even on the rare occasions we DO all get together, there are so many other distractions (many of us have young kids of our own now).

It just isn’t the same as when we used to stay up till 3 am on Christmas Eve, my cousins and I, playing with our new toys together, while the adults played cards in the other room…

Your concept of family may change too. It’s no longer just about blood relations (especially as various in-laws or step-family members are added). Not everyone was blessed with a close-knit, loving family. Others may have no close family left or those that remain may live too far away to visit with every holiday. For many, friends make a wonderful, adoptive family.

There is always a sense of loss of family members, and “the old ways”. One of the only real guarantees we have in life is that things WILL change. This can be a good thing, though. We can store up wonderful memories of bygone days, and continue some old traditions from times past while seeking to embrace new practices that will carry with them wonderful memories of their own.

New Traditions

Mr. Trekker and I have started to develop our own traditions. Christmas Eve, I make homemade lasagna, then we open presents with my parents (gotta keep that tradition alive!) and still enjoy a candlelit, church service. We also like to watch a “big” Christmas movie that night, like “It’s a Wonderful Life”. 😁 Then, before bed, we read “The Night Before Christmas”. (When I was a kid we often read the Christmas story out of the Book of Luke, from the Bible, but now we kinda figure we’ve just heard it at church, so… 😉) Then…for the big finale…we have a little slumber party in the living room with the dog, under the glowing lights of the Christmas tree! Who needs kids to have fun?! 😂

When Christmas morning comes, we start it off with homemade treats for breakfast! Then, there’s Facetime chats with Mr. Trekker’s side of the family (we “Zoomed” Christmas morning with relatives who live in far-off places for years, long before COVID made it cool! 😝) Then it’s time for the big, Christmas dinner! Finally, we end the evening on the couch watching “A Christmas Story” (the one with Ralfie…”you’ll shoot your eye out!”)

To Conclude

Change is inevitable, and I will CHERISH those Christmas memories from when I was a kid for the rest of my life. But I am also excited to make new memories, in the new situations we find ourselves, and with the new friends and family who may be joining us in the years to come.

I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday! Enjoy your traditions with your own friends and families (be they blood-relation or otherwise and whether they are in-person or virtual) this holiday. Merry Christmas to you all, and as Tiny Tim would say, “God Bless us, everyone!” 😉

Tell me about your family’s Christmas traditions in the comments!

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